I'm most horrified at the white chocolate because ew.

Ahahahaha. I would have shit on him to teach him a lesson.

Is it not widely known that stress can mess with your cycle? Or that many women can't take hormonal birth control? There isn't a "one size fits all" handy approach to dealing with periods. Jfc.

I love when my husband answers the door and yells for me. You can see the wind go out of people’s sales because they know I don’t have time for their bs.

Mine is trying to get me to shave the sides of my head and would pretty much love if I rocked a Chelsea cut. Why does everyone assume all men like long hair?! Or that we care.

I think many of us are hesitant to demand the respect we deserve because, by and large, we are told by the world that we *don’t* deserve it. Even though we know that’s bullshit but still.

Weak handshakes piss me off. Or when men don’t even put out their hand for me to shake it and then look amused when I put mine out -motherfucker, it’s called manners. Get on board.

I’m obsessed with Trivia Crack and will play anyone (my friends and I used to have Trivial Pursuit nights in high school; HARDCORE NERDS). My manager mentioned that her son - who also works with us - loves it so we played a few games and then I noticed he vanished. I asked my manager if he stopped playing and she…

Lol, one of mine tries to pull the rings off my fingers. When I had acrylic nails he would nibble on them. Weirdo.

How can a sermon be too religious? Like...what is it you expected?!

Yes, this. One of my co-workers gives her kids so much shit that they call Easter “second Christmas”. WTF. When I was younger I got a basket, a stuffie, and maybe a small piece of jewelry (like, Claire’s jewelry). When the hell did the switch happen?

This actually makes my heart hurt. No wonder the poor kid left, fuck those people.

She has the most gorgeous hair.

The tiniest airplane on Earth. I was 13 and the family - my mom (awesome), my uncle (asshole), and my father (KING ASSHOLE) - went to Las Vegas for a week. My father was obsessed with flying over the Grand Canyon so we woke up early, ate a big breakfast (eggs, french toast, hot chocolate - all of these will make an…

Well, good; we won’t have to put up with her trolling bs for much longer then...

Well, good; we won’t have to put up with her trolling bs for much longer then...

In these scenarios “good for you!” is the same as “bless your heart” and both set my teeth on edge.

Whenever I hear that song I sub in Dave Chappelle’s lyrics.

Yes, thank you, it would. That line in Bey's song makes me bonkers.

I will check that out, thanks!