The real Skip Bayless is locked in a cell several hundred feet underground. There, his cruel captors siphon hot takes from his shattered mind 24 hours a day. Bayless huddles in the corner of his cell, naked but for a rough sackcloth and short length of hempen rope that he uses as a belt because it isn’t long enough to…

Take your star, you jerk.

Getting tackled by a girl is nothing to be ashamed of. Now getting tackled by a kicker...

What sport?

Monkeyshines isn’t off the table if his lawyer has any stones.

Surely his lawyer can plea bargain his Mischief charge down to Tomfoolery.

His punishment will almost certainly be a lifetime ban from Blue Jays games. Or, if he has a really good lawyer, he’ll get a lifetime ban from Blue Jays and Leafs games.

Ain’t nobody ever gonna accuse Donald Trump of thinking through the implications of literally anything he says, for even a second.

If you send things back multiple times at your OWN restaurant it gives the people you’re with the impression that the food is not good. The very people you are trying to impress.

Oh I have no idea about his guilt but it sort of seems like the court of public opinion hasn’t rendered a verdict which is surprising to me. This feels like it should be a headline story across the country. What I am not a fan of is the insinuations on the part of his lawyers but those say nothing about his guilt or…

And you’re a weird fucking kind of hero for posting it!

Guy hitting .205 in High-A ball is worried about the wrong Mendoza.

Civil trial, not a criminal trial. So your hyperbole can cool a bit.

Its strange that this isn’t the biggest sports story in the country. Her story is just utterly terrifying. The idea of a former MVP now playing in New York being part of such a graphically abhorrent act and it sort of feels like a page 13 story. I even came into this article looking to make some joke about Rose’s…

What the actual fuck?

I hate to agree with The Donald, but that does look like a subpar blowjob technique!

This is a weird fucking picture

Note to self: You should be so much better at soccer by now.

Keep working, Karaoke. Maybe someday you can play for...Brendan Rodgers 

“What a time it must be to be Karamoko Dembélé.”