So, just so we are clear here is a quick summary of Tammy Duckworth’s life:

This killed me last night. It makes me think of the “More Cowbell” sketch. The premise is ridiculous, it’s a one-note sketch, it isn’t so inherently funny as it is bizarre, but based on the total commitment of the performer is an instant classic.

He slapped that dong and my damn eyes bulgogi’d right out of my face.

I’ve cried when my Mets have given up homers before, but not like this.

Watching Eddie Perez on SC right now is rough.

This is probably the worst thing to happen in the south Florida sports community in a long, long time.

Justin Verlander can’t be bothered to play, as he’s used to getting hit in the face by large jugs on a nightly basis.

There was a brief argument over which game to play in the locker room, but obviously Cooler Heads prevailed.

“Don’t play baseball with the Tigers.”- Dontrelle Willis

Russell: Siri, how do I score?

Searches: Most popular sex positions.

I just helped you sell 50,000 more copies. You’re welcome.

1.

The Triple A’s are also an alias used by the Miami Marlins.