Yeah, did you miss the whole USFL thing?

Okee dokee. That's fair.

Old saying: If you start counting something, it immediately improves.

Exactly.

Again with the Gruden thing.

I don't have the slightest idea what you're talking about.

That's fair. Though he didn't do a lot after that.

The most successful Tampa Bay pro football coach is still Steve Spurrier.

"If I go to Happy Valley, do I have to be happy?" —— Lane Kiffin

I remember a really violent LA Stallions game against Cleveland back in '91. This one guy took quite a shot from Billy Cole.

Blah blah blah, genius.

Thanks for missing the point.

Once again, fantasy football isn't football. It's fucking algebra.

I think my favorite Dierdorfism of the last several years was "If you're going to throw that pass, you'd better think about completing it."

Yes, Chris Myers is the worst. Before going to look, I'm going to guess most of FOX's people rank high on the list of the worst.

Blown lead? Totally not your fault.

Other things Thom Brennaman doesn't realize:

He's no Jeff Gillooly.

Now, see, if I say that, people lose they minds.

What his cousin (sorry, Cousin) is going through is nothing compared to what Riley Cooper went through, amiright?