It’s so narrow minded. And to think, whenever I hear any accent that is different than mine I get excited because it means I am meeting someone with a different background from me! How cool! I wonder what we will learn from each other! Linguistics alone is so fascinating, nevermind cultural comparisons in general!

I wasn’t aware that being a brain surgeon meant you removed your own brain.

No. Way worse. Don’t get me wrong: Nixon authorized criminal activities while president and was truly a huge dick, but even he maintained the veneer of civility and the rule of law until right at the end, when he completely lost it. Trump is “Nixon wandering drunk in the White House, talking to paintings” right out of…

...and still be dumb enough to think the signs say “we (the people) don’t need Planned Parenthood” rather than “we (5 guys) don’t need Planned Parenthood”?

Right? She’s not Bakhytzhan Sagintayev, Hüseyin Özgürgün or Saara Kuugongelwa.

It’s tough dough to plough through, that’s for sure.

Except he goes on to say those with a birthday above 12 were let thru while the others were not. Am I wrong In assuming that the dob was compared against some database? If that’s true, and a number higher than 12 reveals that the first number represents day rather than month for some, then why wouldn’t they make the…

“We look to have a great relationship with all countries, ideally, unfortunately that won’t necessarily happen, unfortunately probably won’t happen with many countries, but if we could have as we do with Prime Minister May, and the relationship we’ve all developed, and even the short relationship that we’ve just…

Hell, the US Military uses DD/MM/YYYY. Also 24-hour time. (Military time.)

Best advice I ever got. That and, “If your result is absurd, but your reasoning is sound, check your premise.”

Yup.

Monogrammed thermos syndrome

“Jesus chose exactly who he wanted be president.”

Personne ne parle français mieux que moi. Je parle grandement.

On va enculer ce mec avec une tronçonneuse rouillé?

My wife and I recently lost our twin boys, Anton and Colin, at 20 weeks gestation. They were handsome, they were healthy, but my wife had an unforeseen and undiagnosed incompetent cervix despite being on bedrest for most of the 20 weeks, and we were advised that we need to deliver or we would lose three lives instead…

BROINI is funny.

To be fair they tried to give him a double-breasked jacket but he couldn’t stop laughing, grabbing at the air, and making honking noises.

“Bigly”

I just want to highlight this passage for anyone who skims or just jumps to the comments. Because truer words.