Reason #2863 I’m single in my early 40s: I don’t play this game with people. I don’t ego stroke the fragile men. I will not play dumb, I will not pretend I can’t change my own flat tire, and I will never say in a breathy voice, “Ohhhhhh, your arms are soooo biiiggggg....” No. Because people who need that in order to…

I just crack up. Yes, come to Canada, with its marriage equality and universal health care, because you’re angry about marriage equality and the ACA.

I need an Obama “2015 And Out Of Fucks to Give Tour” T-shirt.

I just used this on a pissy commenter on ROYGBIV earlier and, fuck it, it’s still relevant:

This is incredibly moving. It may have taken six years, but this week I got the POTUS I voted for. Love him & his Out of Fucks to Give 2015 tour.

MAN THE BARRICADES IT’S COMING

At what point should I stop drinking tears if I have to drive later on?

I feel the need to brag about something, because I KNOW how hard people have it who work in restaurants and bars, so I always try to be decent and good, and tip well no matter what.

Heh. Bump that. As I said in another comment, I was in my first EF at 21, and I am nowhere near done causing trouble.

That sounds like a birthday party purchase. When my daughter was little and I was on welfare I saved up a little on the EBT card every month (by skipping meals myself) so I could spend that $40 on her birthday party food. Because even us poors want to give our kids a small but appreciated birthday. Now that I’m rich…

Okay, so this is part of a novella I submitted to get into grad school (and it worked — I got in!). It’s basically this guy’s dystopic vision plus five years:

“When I can’t afford it on my pay, I don’t want people on the taxpayer’s dime to afford those kinds of foods either.”

I cannot lie I love Eileen Fisher.

I would buy an album by David Duchovny when he is playing Jeff Goldblum on SNL's celebrity jeopardy.

RIP Bunheads

Oh yeah, no. I used to do a lot of video editing, so I always got the most memory and disk space as I possibly could. Thus I've only had three Powerbooks since 1993. (Although I definitely would have replaced this one by now if I could).

They're taking one for the team! I have a knack for making random kids in stores stop crying. I look at them gravely and say, "I know, it's terrible, isn't it?" It works more often than it doesn't, I think it just shocks the kid into stopping, and the parents always snicker. That's my contribution.

d) or they will take care of you and it will ruin their own lives, but let's all remember that it's NOT having children that is the selfish choice here.