That’s exactly what this guy was trying to say. And there are about 100 million people out there who would gladly pay a steep premium over standard bus fare if that could be arranged.

Now that we’ve discovered gravitational waves and shit, I demand Science develop a viewport into alternative futures, just so I can see how many Elmirajes would have actually been sold if Cadillac had designed to build that beauty. A lot, I’m guessing.  

If you simply have to buy a car with 12 cylinders, I advise spending only half of your budget now. You’ll need the other half for all the repair bills.

Every self-respecting American man:

Yeah, I can see that.

Guts for suspecting something a medical problem and jumping in the car.

Someone needs to convince me why this isn’t possible on ovals. So it’s possible for cars to slow way down and turn left OR right in the rain... but its NOT possible for cars to slow way down and ONLY turn left in the rain?

How about trying this:

Dear Snowflake,

Their fault.

If the map is accurate, that would be like the Chinese patrolling around, say, Bermuda. The site of the encounter is nowhere near their territory.

I agree it’s not very wide open in Times Square, but a drunk or inattentive driver accidentally jamming down on the wrong pedal will get you up to speed really fast no matter where you are.

The fact that the guy had PCP in his system makes her version of events believable. That stuff can do scary things to people.

It sounds like no one really knows anything, except for the author, for whom it appears the truth is whatever is most convenient to his lib agenda.   

That’s the best looking you say? Hmm......

Next I want a car dealership that operates on the same principle as those grabby-claw machines in arcades. You pay a certain amount, say $10,000, for one chance to grab a supercar with the big claw and hoist it over to the chute.

Isn’t this what happened to that Tesla a year ago? I mean the one that peeled its roof off underneath the trailer, then kept truckin’ right down the highway for a few more miles, with an ostensibly-headless driver still at the controls?

Umm... everyone knows you can’t just swap a ticket with someone else.

The biggest balls were clearly possessed by the flight attendant who put herself between two hard-swinging males twice her size.  

Holy shit.