It's okay. That glorious piece of the Swedish Motherland will live to fight another day.

Sure, Hardibro. You may think that this was a Jalopnik-fueled win, but no.

Chevrolet.

Dude's kinda cute. I'd mistake him for a chick if he had makeup on.

SAY THAT TO MY FACE IRL M8

Bright Side: Rollcage did it's job.

HELLA PROTIP:

I do too, but a little girl can dream.

Pros: This might mean a thicker Super Chevy for me to read every month.

I like how 'Series.Blue' makes it hard for me to read press releases without going, 'who the fuck edited this' before realizing it's a proper noun

fuck this WHERE'S MY GT-90, FORD?????

I'd be pissed, but if the batteries were stuck back into service, what's the big bitchfest about? At that point, they're (mostly) just empty i3s.

This one definitely wins Jalopnik's 'Dumbass of the Day' Award, 4/30/14.

From deep within the cold, icy depths of Gothenburg and Tom Walkinshaw's testicles, we were gifted with this dangerous, strange hero-beast in the year of our Moose Overlords, 1994. It was built to combat Satan's Nazi-loving Germans in their 318i's, and to stop the dirty, stinking Italians in their Alfas.

I nominate this post for Jalopnik's 'Cocksucker of the Day' Award.

I got sick on Thursday and couldn't make it down from Columbia... and I am STILL pissed about that.

HIS HOLINESS THE HELLA BATTLEWAGON GREATLY APPROVES OF THIS POST. MAY SATAN ALWAYS SHINE IT'S AUDI ASS-KICKING LIGHT DOWN UPON YOU, MATT HARDIGREE

HIS HOLINESS THE HELLA BATTLEWAGON IS HIGHLY PLEASED WITH THIS RESULT. THOR HAS GIVEN US, THROUGH HIS TEARS, A PIECE OF MAJESTIC DRIVING SKILL IN THE YOUNG KIWI.

HIS HOLINESS THE HELLA BATTLEWAGON APPROVES. LET A SINGLE, BLESSED TEAR FALL FROM THE EYES OF THOR ONTO US AS WE ACCEPT THIS GREAT GIFT FROM THE BEYOND.

The strangeness of this is not beyond me - my father (in one of his stranger moves), bought a 1984 AMC Eagle last week.