Those writing for Gawker's Saturday featured posts should read this as a primer.

Wooooow, what a sweetheart! Has she squeezed herself into a cat condo in that picture?!

Hmm, I think I'd struggle the most with the 300-meter run. The metric system. It gets me every time.

Anytime. Just throw up the signal, and I'll be there.

I think you've had enough Internet for the day. Shut 'er down. Go get some air.

Hilarious article overall, but the gas station passage is making me want to tear my hair out.

You pointed out in your original comment that you were unsure as to whether it was the case or not. I was trying to be helpful. Apparently my original reply was not taken well.

No, although I appreciate you emphasizing "actual police officer." I'm not an actual police officer, but I am an actual lawyer. It seems like you're trying to make a "hot pursuit" argument by throwing out that the sirens are not on. Obviously, if the police officer is not planning on pulling someone over, the…

That was probably a terrible day (sorry), but the mental image made me laugh.

Also, while I'm thinking about it, I might as well point out that Jay-Z also gives terrible legal advice. A locked glove compartment is not going to prevent a warrantless search if police have probable cause to believe evidence of a crime is in there, e.g., you get pulled over for the aforementioned tag violation and…

You know, I'm not sure. I think it stems from misconceptions like DabFan's explanation that police aren't going to follow onto private property, which is probably related to a misinterpretation of the protections of the Fourth Amendment. It's also a really comforting idea that there's a place of refuge that we can…

You can get pulled over at a gas station. You can also get ticketed in your own driveway. This is not a real rule.

You can be pulled over while at a gas station. You can also be cited in your own driveway.

You can be pulled over while at a gas station. You can also be cited in your own driveway.

Holy shit. Were you able to successfully fight the ticket?

I drive with my dog in the car a lot, and having her perceived a a "threat" is a pretty big worry if I'm pulled over, tbh. It is totally irrelevant that she is a cocker spaniel, blind, and sleeping 75% of the time.

Love the name.

Oh, god, the landlord who is for once reluctant to invade his tenants' personal space and stands up for their rights? I love that guy.

Ha! Exactly the point I just made without checking the rest of the thread first. I like your version better.

That makes a lot of sense. I hadn't thought about it that way. I wish instead of using detectives as stand-ins, problematic because of their positions of power and presumed knowledge on the show, they had other dolts to fling those lines onto.

The last few weeks have shown the L&O: SVU detectives acting as real boneheads. Last week, maybe the week before, had an episode in which one of the detectives (!) had to be convinced that rape could happen to a man.

Also, based on some of the recent reports from the real world, I am not convinced that your hope…