I’m astonished - I didn’t know you could legally call something a restomod if you don’t drop in a crate V8 and put 20+ inch chrome rimz on.

Let’s start denying medication and treatment to men in case it affects their sperm?

I guess the Republican narrative is that somehow kids are getting drive-through sex changes on a whim with as little oversight as a drunken New Orleans tattoo.

It’s forty hours of being hit in the head with a Bible and being screamed at by a Glenn Beck type that you’re WRONG and why is the Devil in you?

Hmm.... this suggests a whole new approach to drag racing, where you have to run to the car in heels and get the best quarter mile time while checking your makeup in the rear-view mirror.

No, Elon, I don’t think this is going to get Paris to have a child with you.

There are two obvious reasons this truck isn’t sold in America:

Might as well call it ‘Meowguffin’.

I would like to see a lawsuit brought against someone who drives a group of anti-abortion protestors to an out-of-state abortion clinic, with the goal of making them prove that their purpose was *not* to have an abortion.

I’m sure they take no responsibility for what their guns are used for once they leave the store, in the same way that their customers take no responsibility for what happens to the bullets once they leave the barrel.

In a functioning modern democracy, the Republicans would admit that they actually consist of several parties with different constituencies and goals, and break up accordingly. You know, so they’d have to work together to advance moderate policies which balanced different stakeholders’ needs, instead of crushingly…

I’m assuming that the wheels, catalytic converters and contents of every car will be gone within 48 hours, to the bemusement of the guards on duty, anyway.

I feel like he doesn’t really understand what it means to be a billion dollars in debt.

“Hunter Biden’s Satanic connections occasionally cause me to breathe out pro-choice steam.”

Yeah, if you’re a patriot, what’s your gun doing in your car? You should have it on you at all times, particularly in public, where you can ostentatiously display it and get in peoples’ faces about YOUR RIGHTS.

Only first-class passengers are guaranteed oxygen - all other seats have it provided as a courtesy.

“Turkeys - please vote, not just for Thanksgiving, but for the complete eradication of all turkeys!”

Why on earth would any organization bother using TwitXr any more? Time to find another way to communicate.

Oh, no! Heaven forfend that business groups and conservatives should attack Joe Biden! Inconceivable!

I expect that the spectators all stood up and howled until the refs skated up and told them to pick up their sticks and put their gloves back on.