Part of it is because the final duel between Kylo and Luke wasn’t really a final duel at all and Luke didn’t go out in a Blaze of Glory.

Marvel’s Darth Vader series is a long answer to this very question. Since Vader is one of two people who survive the Death Star fiasco, he bears the brunt of the Emperor’s ire and basically has to kill A LOT of rebels single-handedly to get back off the sh*t list.

But Vader maims and murders so well that he ends up…

Major spoiler alert:

Wrong, it’s Blue Jays first-baseman Justin Smoak.

I prefer “You are soooooo good looking” when someone sneezes.

So, the scene in TFA about a ship abandoning Rey as a child was another red herring? I don’t want answers for the sake of answers, I want answers because TFA spent much of its time making these things mysterious. I don’t need to know who Poe’s parents are, because there were never any hints that was relevant. We…

How so? Middle class people in Red States are essentially going to pay little to nothing in taxes now. The median family income in Mississippi, for example, is 35k. They get a standard deduction of 25k and 2k per kid. They’ll be getting money back from The Feds.

I mean, you’re right. We’ve seen hands and arms chopped off, the insides of Tauntauns, people beheaded and cut in half, etc, but no. No face melting.

I wouldn’t have cared at all if Episode VII hadn’t rubbed my face in it to begin with. Don’t tell me “What’s the big mystery?” and then two years later tell me, “Haha. Fuck you.”

Can I just add this little take on this particular subject? It is not a fact in TLJ that Rey’s parent’s sold her for drinking money and are in unmarked graves on Jakku. That’s what Ben Solo/Kylo Ren told her and he lies constantly. Just like he told Hux that Rey killed Snoke for example. I think Rey’s parentage could…

Every time I see that movie title I think of Troy McClure’s The Contrabulous Fabtraption of Professor Horatio Hufnagel.

I saw the trailer when I saw Thor: Ragnarok and it was so treacly it made me want to vomit. It’s like somebody set a Hallmark Special to music and replaced all the scenes of the brave, dying child with unused footage from The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus.

This is wholly correct, but I’d only add that Luke is by far the most central point of identification in the Original Trilogy. Sure, Leia and Han get plenty to do - and there’s plenty reason to find one’s self more attached to and enamored of them. But Luke is not only the entry point into the broader narrative in A…

Maybe think of it like this: there’s no way the inhabitants of a galaxy far, far away are actually speaking English, so the dialogue we hear has been, in a sense, “translated” for our benefit (in the same way that you can watch an American movie about Nazi Germany where all the characters are speaking English). So…

I don’t know, I can agree it might have been nice to learn a little bit more about Snoke and then still kill him here, but I think just because there was some misdirection with Rey’s background doesn’t mean she shouldn’t have been shown wondering about her parents; there’s still a lot of pathos in her being an orphan…

You’ve cracked it. Supreme Leader Snoke is actually Supreme Leader Felicity Smoak.

Well all need to remember that only Siths deal in absolutes.

What about Space Ghost? As a fellow ghost, you should be cool with him, no?

Judge her by her size, do you?

don’t really care who you are, no one should be writing novel-length Instagram captions. It’s hard enough to read 20 words on Instagram, let alone that post.