Is that you, dad? I only ask because you sound like a moron.

Someone on another site said to try hitting the number next to the star. It's been working for me, on my iPhone.

eating a salad as a full meal is like eating whispers

You monster!

Everyone clicked on this because they thought they were gonna see a nip slip

Simmons, Olbermann, Cowherd - ESPN Departes

It’s so fun to click on an article and then scramble to find the offending ad’s mute button.

You know what’s more terrible than the police not taking this case seriously?

Still not sure about this version of the Joker. Comes across too much like some kind of mob boss than the insane ‘Clown Prince’ that the Joker actually is.

It wasn’t sexist, reddit was really revolting about ethics in salary negotiations.

“Nothing funnier than white people hopping and dancing away from fire.”

I had sex with my date in the backseat of my jeep cherokee while my best friend Paul drove it home. He was alone as his date had bailed on him to go to some party at Rick’s house...Rick was a cool guy soccer player. I brought this up very often over the remainder of our time in high school.

Fuck. You.

It’s funny, just last night I was thinking that the thing this summer needs is a rousing FIRE BARRY movement.

But don’t you know everyone who visits Deadspin is a ripped bro who’s crushing pussy 24/7?

Nah, this is the kind of guy who thinks he can be a badass on Jezebel because the guys on Deadspin ran him off and made him cry.

Ghosting sucks but it is NOT the worst way to break up. The worst way is when someone wants to break up with you but is too chicken shit to just do it, and instead strings you along for weeks, treating you shittier and shittier, becoming more obnoxious and distant, until you finally dump them because you’ve had enough…

Yeah, I wish jez writers would like try to not just write about their friends.

It’s where you go to find 20-something men who think their 3.4 GPA in high school makes them members of an international intellectual elite.

Batman eating out a chick.