"Goddamn you, International Date Line! Why must you zag so?!"

That book had a lot of good ideas, horribly executed. Batman waging a guerilla war against a dystopian America ruled by President Lex Luthor? That could have been AMAZING, instead of sad and terrible…

Axe Body Spray is scientifically proven to trick teenage boys into thinking they can get laid.

Timeflation.

I know, right? They left their phone in the car, so they can't Google some decent porn, so they just imagine it in their heads, and their imagination sucks, so they're stuck imagining Daphne and Velma from Scooby-Doo scissoring. And they were too lazy to locate some hand lotion so they know there's going to be…

Except for some reason the entire movie was built on the conceit that for some reason when he touched what's her face's hand he saw two weeks ahead of time and it was some dumb "It was all a dream" ending right?

Wasn't that actually what happened in that NIc Cage movie? Like the whole movie was him foreseeing the next two weeks (for some reason he saw ahead two weeks that time), so the entire movie was like one of those "it was all a dream plots"

You're going to buy a coffee. You're going to hail a taxi. You're going to get in the taxi. The taxi is going to hit a pothole. You're going to spill coffee on your leg. It's going to hurt.

Where's that Eye of the Needle reboot I've been waiting for?!

You're right, it's hard to argue against a point that no one could identify.

I LIKE THE TREES HERE! THEY'RE THE RIGHT HEIGHT!

Also you have to end it with "RON PAUL 2016!"

So can we get Katzenberg into Firefly, now?