Who is talking about a contest? I’ve been riding 20 years, motorcycles are my only transportation. I’ve ridden Harleys throughout Latin America, through rain, storms, boiling heat, etc. Funny, in my area it’s not uncommon to see cruiser riders (and small displacement bikes) in the rain, but I rarely see the dual-sport…

All the while shitting over anything the majority of motorcycle riders actually, you know, buy.

Heavy metal cruisers are fine but ridiculous.

My God, of all the Harleys to pick on you choose the best - yet least popular - bike in the lineup.

Another lame prank ad, Ray Wert was involved so this is nothing more than a native ad.

Ray Wert is a scumbag shill, everything he’s involved in makes me feel used and insulted.

You’d have loved the porn industry circa ~’03.

How about no. How about a plug-in hybrid made by a very large American car manufacturer (Captain Motors) that was championed by a mildly senile darling of the automotive press (Dick Nutz) which was promptly bought by a few people in Crasholet trim, and absolutely no one ever in Douchellac trim? HA!

Alfa Romeo Juliet? That’s queer Eurotrash garbage and awful lot of vowels round these parts. We’re talkin’ ‘Murican quality, dipshit. Four words for you: MOPAR or no car.

Bingo.

Me too. =(

That’s exactly what I was thinking. He looks better than a lot of 50 year olds I know.

Congrats, that’s a great bike.

Oh man, the suspension is bad? This car is clearly deeply flawed, it breaks. Do tell, what airbagged equipped car isn’t prone to issues with the bags?

Whoa, what bastion of civilization are you from?

Well, you’re kind of an asshole, Fred... so there’s that.

I’ve been riding for 21 years, perhaps I haven’t achieved your Jedi level of deep motorcycle mastery, but the tube frame Buells have well-documented issues with snapping motor mounts and easily bent frames. I would think a Buell professor such as yourself would…

I owned a Buell, it was a piece of shit.

I saw that movie when I was a kid and would hallucinate about it in fever dreams. For years I thought it was an imagined memory... and then the internet happened and I learned Zardoz was really a movie. The drugs were obviously much better back in the early ‘70s.

Yeah, JimZ, you tell ‘em - eat the rich.

This is some of the best writing I’ve seen on Gawker Media for a long time.