Jonathan Adler, you have a line at Target, you no longer get to make that joke.

“per say” PER SE, PER SE, PER SE! Sorry.

I’m probably one of the few that still likes the first one unironically with all its flaws, so a new one, a good new one makes me really happy.

My mom used to carry her own mini maracas in her purse because she never knew when she would need them. (She needed them often.)

They have, each season, portrayed the zombies in the main show to a greater and greater level of decomposition.

Doesn’t sound English to me, sounds like “Claire Meade in Ugly Betty”’s accent.

From the looks of it, this is a great topic for her to make a strong positive statement. Sadly, the cynic in me suspects maybe this might be all drummed up for promotion

Your grandma’s bed wore it better (I can just tell).

The show is shit..

What a coincidence!

At a certain point, your husband is an adult and knows exactly what the fuck is going on.

We don’t know each other and I don’t want to get in your business, but in your shoes, if my husband stayed at the event, we should have a (polite) convo about marriage as a team against that kind of bullshit.

Except...she doesn’t show her flaws, nor does she accept herself the way she is, and neither does her husband.

Count the motherfucking clauses in that sentence. Forget the horrifying shit show that was the topic, any editor who let that damn clusterfuck out the door should be fired on the spot for that alone.

I love that when say I’m going to the “stabby mall” my friends and family all know I mean LakeForest!

“Real Housewives of Gaithersburg, where the Grove isn’t the only Shady thing goin’ on”

I’m game to star in the Real Housewives of Gaithersburg.