I’m going to guess it was a neckbeard showdown.

I worry about people who can smile in moments that should create stress.

Still...

• Degrading dialogue, e.g., “Suck this cock, bitch” while slapping her face with a penis

a list of sex acts that he recommended pornographers not film so as to avoid possible legal problems with the U.S. Government.

That’s one of the few benefits of the Nike running app. They have a “power song” button where you can link it to a song on your device and when you’re ready - BOOM! - that one song starts playing. You can hit it whenever you need a boost, middle or end of the run.

THE ABSURDITY of SWAMPS

Where have I seen something similar to this before?...

“I procrastinate, am constantly late to things, and accidentally miss appointments and bail on plans without intending to. Needless to say, I end up inadvertently piss people off without meaning to. Help?!”

He’s just looking for an excuse to use it...

The only Flacco kid that LIKES shopping at Old Navy.

And she looks nothing like them! Whose kid is that???

Could you move, you’re standing in my breakdancing space...

I recently sliced my thumb pretty good using a mandolin while trying to cut an onion. So yeah. unless it’s an already formed burger patty, eff all of this “chop this” and “cut that” in a cooking-after-drinking post.

Straight up. Even tipsy, there’s a big risk of cutting off the tip of a finger. And doesn’t blood flow more easily when there’s a significant amount of alcohol in the system?

I dunno. The subtle bestiality of the Geico pig commercial seemed pretty...something?

Old guy strength is the best.

I didn’t expect to get my favorite article of the week so early, but there we are.

You obviously had Arabian nights on the brain.