deadspin reporter gets cold shoulder covering reporter who got cold shoulder covering retorter with cold shoulder

“First Godzilla destroys Boston, then Ortiz gets shot, and now the Bruins lose the cup because of officials!”
*chugs 4 Narragansett Shandy’s*
*masturbates to a picture of Tom Brady*
*goes back to sleep on futon*
*continues to be unemployed*
- A Bruins fan

Counterpoint: David Price is an over-sensitive penis, who is using what should be an incredibly happy moment to instead settle a score in which he is the only side who really cares or thinks it’s personal.

You really can’t tell if an intended joke is actually a joke unless and until people laugh. I thought it might be moderately amusing, but since nobody chuckled or emitted a faint grin, I was clearly wrong.

Oh, it’s far worse than that. I’m a self-loathing Braves, Hawks, and Falcons fan. And politically, I’m a hardcore liberal who grew up in the blood-red suburbs north of Atlanta. I hate this state’s politics and its hot, humid weather. And when conjuring the state of my dreams, one similar to Massachusetts is what would…

Yes, that’s my point. They suck as people and they might as well jump ship to the party of their spiritual brethren.

What’s your point? Conservative white dipshit Southerners spent decades voting for Democratic politicians at the federal level who pushed for policies that were utterly at odds with their conservative values. Just because some people vote for the people I’d prefer they vote for doesn’t mean they’re good people.

I mean, you all have got the same sociopathic enjoyment of the fact that other people rightfully despise you and the same sadistic delight in people’s pain. Much like the leader of that political cult, your fanbase has been born into privilege and derives pleasure and riches from it through no accomplishment of their o…

I’m gonna just take a moment to appreciate how happy I am that Matthew Rhys won.  The Americans never got enough love but it’s up there with Breaking Bad as one of my all time favorites.  Anyway, my head always nearly exploded when I’d remember that Matthew Rhys was a Welsh guy who was pretending to be Russian who was…

The other sad part is that when the big brawl broke out during the game Micky Redmond had left the booth to get downstairs for an intermission interview. Mike Goldberg? Goldman?, who was the crappy play-by-play guy for one year between Dave Strader and Ken Daniels was left alone in the booth. His voice is immortalized…

+1 PASS sports reference

This is the most interesting thing to happen to the Detroit Tigers in the last two seasons.

Mandelbaum! Mandelbaum!

Let me be the first to make this joke.

I am in physical pain from how much I identify with this.

It’s incredibly disappointing to see a team with so much potential come up short year-after-year for two years.

Papa Emeritus is dead. Long live Cardinal Copia:

I dare you to find me someone more self-righteous and dead inside than a higher education administrator. At least the vampire capitalists are honest about their intentions.

After he recovers, he’ll have the best glans in baseball.