I assumed I didn’t like Velveeta until I had it in a chili cheese dip. I was wrong. It was good.

You speak the truth. I don’t even find her annoying, I feel like she’s like an awesome rich aunt who is always on a nice xanax / reisling combo and can cook like a motherfucker.

The damn thing was even sold out at one point.

Holy shit. I had to look that up for myself. Bravo to whomever came up with that. I can’t even be mad at that. I want to see the people paying $85 for this.

I’m glad SOMEbody finally said it. If it works for them, hey, great. But she should know those “naps” aren’t going any further than a cuddle maybe.

No thanks. I’m buying this $85 rock from Nordstroms with which I will hit myself repeatedly to unconsciousness until 2020.

Dear Ina,

I was on Jeopardy about 10 years ago. He’s short and too tan and wears sleeveless shirts to eat lunch. Real fucking jabroni.

Sorry, Patrick, the correct title was “What is Alex Trebek Hilariously Shits On Jeopardy! Contestant And Her Whole Crew For No Reason”.

And now he’s going to be disqualified for having the runs.

I have the same gait when I have to poop.

That’s certainly one way to keep the pack a safe distance behind you.

I’ve heard it before, but never the part about the Red Wings game is new to me.

Thank you for providing a transcript.

I once accidentally ate a huge pot cookie cause I was starving and it was the only food I could find at a friend-of-a-friend’s house. He was a chef, he only had raw ingredients in the house, it was the only thing I could grab and eat as we drove to our destination, a Ween concert. (What? I was 18, it was 1999,…

We still haven’t topped “cop & his wife eat brownies made from confiscated marijuana, thinks he and his wife overdosed and are dying.”