I prefer the variation on soda, "sody".

You left out "mixer".

When I moved from Western PA, to Massachusetts in 1985, I called sweet carbonated beverages 'pop' and the kids never stopped making fun of me for it.

Jack Johnson's list was very similar, although he completely refuses to acknowledge #3.

Frankly, I'm a little surprised that "Type 2 Diabetes" didn't make the list.

You're missing the UK's (or just Scotland, who knows) effort, "juice", which oh god I am still furious. So many months of confusion and rage.

You are missing industry terms. I would humbly submit

1. Soda

Everyone loves store brand Cola-flavored Carbonated Beverage, don't they?

You can't fool me. "Lolly water" isn't a real term used by anyone. It should be "Carbonated beverage" that should be beneath "Being hit by a car".

"I don't know why I keep getting dragged into this shit..."

Everybody has been a baby, consider it paying it forward.

Right? People act like reproducing is some kind of biological process that bodies are actually designed to carry out. You know what's really a biological imperative? Me downing this entire bottle of scotch.

My country already offers me 14 months (imagine that, dude!) of paid maternity leave, a subsidized daycare place once the little critter is 12 months old, child benefits until the kid is 18 or 25 years old and job security, as long as I'm pregnant or on maternity leave. My country would also like me to procreate…

You do know how babies are made, right?

WOW, the fact that they would accommodate drivers who lost licenses because of DUIs but not pregnant women is disgusting. When I sold cars being able to drive and being able to be insured was an integral part of the job, and it was made very, very clear to me that a DUI meant automatic firing. But a UPS driver who was…

Come on, USA, it's about time you earned the term first world country and implemented several weeks of maternity leave before and at least half a year after someone gives birth. Paid maternity leave, of course. It might even help with abortion rates, because people are more inclined to have a baby, when they know they…

is Maccas supposed to be McDonalds?! Wow. Learn a new thing every damn day.

Fun fact, your body naturally produces formaldehyde and so there's already about 16 mg of formaldehyde in your blood.