Apparently, Senator Turtle (R-Pond) is livid with his new “Moscow Mitch” nickname. 

Fucking hell.

I’m not a doctor, but anyone in the front office should be able to remove it.

In more than one small Ohio town I have been tailed for some time for no other reason that I was the only one around and/or I was driving out of state plates. And I don’t think I’d be wrong to suggest that my being a white man is literally the only reason I wasn’t stopped.

Exactly. The last thing Ohio police need is another tool to enforce “[insert doing anything in a car] while black.”

That’s wild. Two professional sports leagues with teams in the same cites that have been competing and building fan bases for the same length of time, yet the numbers are so different.

Okay, but the “value” of the men’s team is directly linked to tournament payouts, which are higher... but why are they higher? Why weren’t all the women’s teams growing their game over the same timeframe?

“Exit meeting"

If Rapinoe is mixing apples and oranges, you’re over here making a damn piña colada.

This fucking team released a hype video of its new quarterback completing short passes. That’s not just setting the bar low, that’s burying it — probably because they intend to let Eli run this team until he’s dead.

“If what was done to [this young man who was brought to this location and dressed in this political propaganda and put in this spot with the goal of creating some confrontation] is not legally actionable, then no one is safe.”

Speaking of fucking cookies...

Often when I find myself around these parts and having clicked on a headline about a subject that I might not typically click on and, to my surprise, I find it actually pretty interesting, I usually scroll up to find “Nick Martin” on the byline. Good work, Nick.

Roaches. They are smaller and there are more of them. 

One-on-one shootouts if tied at the end of a quarter!

Ohmg. 

Yeah, I’m not buying it. This whole thing feels staged to me. 

To be fair, “Ballz” is a big upgrade over his last nickname, “Micro.”

“Some of y'all is peace / but even one to many is still a decent number / for the breeding of a beast"

Idiots. Don't bring knives to a Gunners fight.