I was skeptical, but then Irving says, “This is the stuff that doesn’t make the league fun,” which is a blatant reference to the Knicks. This deal is done. 

Young players prefer to spend their time dying repeatedly in an imaginary world to playing actual basketball for the Knicks. You don’t say.

“Don’t drench the lettuce! Just need a nice delicate coating!”

“They were holding hands, they were kissing as if nobody else existed, as if their kids and their grandkids didn’t exist. It’s just the two of them.”

Kumho Tire presents Darren Rovell as its new spokesperson, in conjunction with its new ad campaign “Play Like You Left the Parking Break On”

and understands the system well enough to figure out how to change it.

File To: Lesson learned.

To be fair, this dude had to stage a whole DUI trial to sell the just-another-day setup, so this is all still pretty on-brand for Florida.

I shouldn’t have stepped in it to begin with.

To be fair, Fraud Playing Games would be a pretty solid Kinja handle.

Get a grip. I see a political landscape populated with a generation of new voices and different perspectives — and I choose them. I choose them over a guy who is, for better or worse, one of two stale flavors of Old White Boomer.

You... you know Joe Crowley is an old white man who was replaced by someone who is neither, right?

Um, I don’t know who you think I am, but no. 

Yes, more old white men, please.

I stand by my research.

That very small percentage of people that are creating all this news, we can’t let that cast a shadow over all the people that aren’t like that.

Pastry and/or dough crust = pie. See, Debbie, Little, meat (Jamaican; Aussie), shepherd, chicken pot.

Counterpoint: Under no circumstances should you open your mouth on the subway.

If you’re visiting NYC, look at a map before you get on the subway. If you can’t figure out which subway line you need or where to get off the train, ask someone for help before you get on the subway. If you have looked at a map, and you have asked someone for help, and you still can’t figure out which subway line you…

No, tacos are open-faced burritos (which belong to the wrap family.) FWIW, the taxonomic distinction between tacos and a hot dog is the wholeness of the food stuff, not the method of containment.