He should tell them it has evolved into Duonucleosis and sit out even longer

he offered to go get ice cream with the kid to patch things up.

Whichever way this goes, at least I know that this absolute untouchable diamond of a clip is still streaming for free on YouTube as we speak.

The obsession with Hillary running in 2020 is one of the dumber fucking things about you right-wingers.

This is basically just Clickhole now.

Hey everybody - look at this stupid asshole right here!

pffft...and they say Canadians are polite.

Love this game. Just gave my copy to my friend for his kids in San Francisco who love playing this type of thing. (I live alone, and it wasn’t getting used much anymore...which sounds like it could be a Gloom card now that I type it.)

Love this game. Just gave my copy to my friend for his kids in San Francisco who love playing this type of thing. (I…

Impossible. Five minutes in prison and the man would explode into a million bats and escape.

I’ve only thought one call was perfect. Around twenty years ago I called a girl I liked to ask her out and the call went to voicemail. I rambled for over six minutes until the system cut me off, including a story about cleaning out my computer keyboard. I never got around to asking her out during the message, or…

Why don’t you go to fox news where you’ll be accepted? Are you that pathetic you just love being a contrarian so that you can have some kind of human interaction in your life?  

I think at this point, it isn’t so much that he’s lying but that he’s voicing the inner fantasies his mind is concocting to preserve itself from the madness.

Assuming this is actually him tweeting it out, he’s NOT an english major - You’re applying your 40yr old ethics/morals to a 20yr old player. He stepped up, owned his mistake and explained himself. Yeah, it was a low hit but I’d sooner give any kid the benefit of the doubt before condemning their career.

The BEST we can…

I feel like apology parsing has serious potential to overtake baseball as our national pastime!

You know what though? As a dude who did not play Pokemon Go. . .It was really cool to watch those first few weeks of people playing. Outside areas that were usually empty were full of people and i kind of got a kick out of people coming up to me to ask me questions about what team I was on anytime I took my phone out.…

Oh thanks! I wrote down Reuzel and will check it out.

Oh thanks! I wrote down Reuzel and will check it out.

I don’t use Dry Shampoo as a cleaning product, I use as a volumizing product that builds-up on my hair, like any mousse or hairspray.

I don’t use Dry Shampoo as a cleaning product, I use as a volumizing product that builds-up on my hair, like any mous…

Trump has been committing impeachable offenses since before he was even elected. 

Good lord, I’m last. I knew it. I somehow knew that I was wrong, top to bottom.

After 3 weeks, Melvin Gordon tired of being a Sans Dinero Charger.