Haha just kidding.

Sounds like she did a lot for her brother and parents. It's very sad all around.

I really liked Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius. But after I read it, I read that his sister accused him of misrepresenting how much he had to do with raising their little brother. The book glossed over the fact that she was also living in Berkeley (as a law student there) and taking care of their brother. She…

The book is doing very well, with an Amazon ranking of 1,662. Publishing is a business. Publishers care about books that will sell a lot of copies. Period.

Veronica is ONE PERCENT Cherokee. It's a little ridiculous to argue that she needs to be raised in her tribe.

Veronica is one percent Cherokee. ONE PERCENT. Come on!

Track it down, kill it, and bury it.

Yeah, I'm straight and I can't imagine many worse things than baking nights, photo shoots, or Lilly Pulitzer clothes. Blechh.

Eh, I use cheap Suave shampoo and conditioner and my hair looks good and I'm female.

I also like calling her The Babykiller. Over 120,000 deaths in the last six years, and counting.

California gives people the right to cancel gym memberships within 45 days of signing the contract, depending on how much money is at stake. They also have the right to cancel gym contracts if they move more than 25 miles away or if they become disabled. Here's a good explanation of the CA law.

I expect
a side effect:
Heinous infections
of their rectums,
with oozing anal crud
and their shit full of blood.

I have a dream that the Gold Channel's PR people will be bludgeoned with a 9-iron.

In an alternate universe, we would have had the hit song "Achy-Breaky Butt."

Looking at that picture... For God's sake, just don't buy her any more makeup!

Yes, because all parents always make great decisions for their children and would never put their 11-year-old in college just so they can brag that their 11-year-old in college.

Some prefer apple pie.

Silvers is spending the weekend preparing a list of the Review's female secretaries and cleaning staff.

Seabiscuit is about a horse—male, of course.