When did college football fans lose their sense of humor?

Plenty more like it to come, if this is any indica tion

I love it when Deadspin is so blunt in its reporting.

Yes, we definitely do not need any more puff pieces to pass on.

They ignored all the smoke and just took the high road.

It is nice they can light up the page clicks without taking a hit to their integrity.

This is the kind of hard-hitting coverage I look for on here. Topical and worldly while remaining blazer focused on sports.

“Brenda, this party is really dying. UNLEASH THE KITTENS!!!”

Strategic kitten reserves are a staple of any good party.

The Super Bowl was so boring that people at the party didn't even stop talking through the commercials. The hosts had locked away their kittens but let them out at halftime to entertain us because the game sure wasn't getting the job done. 

Jeremy Renner is the guar gum of actors. I’m not entirely sure what he/it does - he/it is some kind of filler or binding agent or something? but he/it is in seemingly everything and producers think he/it is somehow an essential ingredient, but no one wants to consume him/it on its own. 

Yeah that’s the real takeaway here. Celebrity worship culture is weeeeeird. 

The fact there are earnest users of the Jeremy Renner app is the real story of this post. 

Just when I start to think I have a decent handle on the world, I find out there’s not only a Jeremy Renner app, but also, apparently, an audience for it.

I stopped reading after the first paragraph. Not because I disagree, but because I agree 100% and it still pisses me off. Not gonna let Greg ruin my mood. “Jozy held up play well.” is a phrase that triggers me like no other.

“Well, this very classy goal in the Bundesliga is one thing, but I just don’t think we can ignore the importance of Jozy’s Zardes’ hold-up play.”-a weirdly large segment the vocal majority of American soccer media and probably most certainly the USMNT coaching staff and Gregg Berhalter himself.

You say that now, but when Jozy rips his hamstring into tiny little pieces after 1 minute of being on the field... well, I guess you’ll still say Sargent should be the one on the roster.

“Well, this very classy goal in the Bundesliga is one thing, but I just don’t think we can ignore the importance of Jozy’s hold-up play.”-a weirdly large segment of American soccer media and probably the USMNT coaching staff.

FWIW, top players don’t play for their high school teams. Academy teams don’t allow players to suit up for their schools and even if some kids split time between travel and school teams, the school season is just 3 months of the year.

The UK has harsh laws regarding acquiring work permits for non-EU players, so it is actually very difficult logistically for American players to play in England at any level w/o an EU passport. We do currently have Cameron Carter-Vickers (who has an English passport) grinding it out at Sheffield United though.