What's this "spell" nonsense? I am not a damn wizard, son!

A spinal cord injury? Well, all right, since you asked so nicely.

John Glover is my TV Riddler of choice, but I have a soft spot for Gorshin. He championed the natty-green-suit costume over the leotard, and for that I thank him.

I jumped ship from the mainstream DC universe juuuuust before Flashpoint got going, so I suppose Post-Infinite Crisis would be the most accurate label. But I have no need for labels other than Riddler! I am the non-mad genius of Gotham, the prince of puzzles, the king of conundra! With my Multiverse Machine prepared…

Wrong Riddler, pal. If I'd ever resembled the fish-faced yokel passing himself off as Eddie Nygma in this show, I'd be too embarrassed to even post a YouTube comment. I'm the one true Riddler, son, the man who knows all the secrets of the universe and won't share. I have broken the multiversal barrier, I've spit over…

Splendid idea! Tell the hospital I sent you!

Corr— oh, wait, the question wasn't "What emotion do I, the Riddler, feel in regards to my counterpart's pointless exposition-spouting cameos?" So sorry.

You're one to talk.

RIDDLE ME THIS, AV CLUB!

Good.

Thanks! Great to be back!

A full twelve hours late and an idiotic answer? I was going to close up shop for the week but you, sir or madam, have earned special treatment. Also emergency treatment, if you're lucky.

TIME'S UP! It's not quite 11:00, but it's my game, no one got the right answer, and I'm bored. The correct answer is: they were too dull for a killer!

That's cute, you took Cyrus Clops' answer and disguised it with a coat of unnecessary verbiage. Oh wait, this isn't Project Runway, and I can do what Heidi Klum only dreams of doing every day.

Hmm, remind me to grease the sides of that shaft. Ha ha, multiple entendre!

Congratulations on simultaneously having the cleverest and stupidest answer so far.

Finally, someone guesses something correctly.

Your circling has come to an end.

Oh, for God's sake.

Oh, if only. The Waynes getting gunned down by an enormous man in high heels would have made for a much more interesting pilot and added some intriguing newcomers to Bats's collection of neuroses.