That's a flaggin'

Step 2.5: Somehow convince accused groper to not even dispute the fact that a groping occurred.

*high fives @cinecraft:disqus*

He could always assemble a group of B-list celebrities and make them compete for it.

Boss's Day is a thing? Or is this just something your office brown-noser came up with?

Darth Maul was one of the last straws I clung to when I was trying to convince myself that Episode I didn't suck. I really liked the ferocity of his lightsaber fight at the end.

I knew a pathological liar in college, but she clearly wasn't in the same league as this guy.

Besides the avatar, I'm really not getting the Rule 34 connection. These seem like garden-variety salacious comments. Maybe "Reposted Every Article on the Internet with a Comments Section Comments" would be better?

*nods along in agreement, desperately hopes there won't be any follow-up questions*

Looks like we have another planted troll for Big-EnjoyThingsInModeration.

We were all with you when you said we couldn't eat eagles, vultures, camels etc.. No problem there, reading you loud and clear, God. But you couldn't just stop there, could you? Had to go and include pork and shellfish. I think we all knew how well that one was going to end.

Last year, Virginia had a proposed constitutional amendment on the ballot that would exempt surviving spouses of of military members killed in action from property taxes. You better believe I mumbled "Lousy mooching war widows…" at every possible opportunity.

Go die in a fire, Libtard.

In honor of Horror Week, I'm currently working on putting some sort of voodoo curse on @epicglottisuvularsuspects:disqus. He/she will pay for what he/she did. You'll all pay.

*Consults Buzzfeed's daily 90's Kid clickbait*

At least part of the Superbowl has to suck, though. I have to put the kids to bed and I need something to be able to fast forward through to catch up. Yes, the commercials and often the game itself suck, but then what am I going to make awkward conversation about around the water cooler the next day?

We tried some oatmeal shampoo and even started buying the insanely expensive food marketed to lunatics, but so far haven't had much luck. The Vet said fleas, but we religiously use flea/tick medicine and they couldn't actually find any evidence of fleas . Maybe the cold weather will work for us as well.

The only realistic sequel they could possibly make would focus entirely on the volume of waste 101 dogs produce in a given day.

Know who else needs some heavy petting?

I actually remember that TV Land once had a call-in vote for viewers to decide which of these two shows they should keep in their line-up. I believe the Munsters won, and I was genuinely baffled that people really preferred that one.