Do you think he likes strangers yelling "FRODO!" at him? For his sake, I hope he does, because if I ever see him, I'm yelling the shit out of that at him.

He gets a fresh bowl of food. I should have mentioned that he eats a little hole to the bottom of the bowl. At which point the gives the rest to the dog and gets fresh food from us.

My cat and dog has this awesome con job going on me and my wife. He annoys us until we feed him, and then he'll knock the food bowl on the ground so the dog can eat it. He then starts annoying us again until we give him more food and we repeat the process.

What else could we possibly mean by "charities"?

Sympathy upvote. My mother-in-law is currently staying at our house. For a week. I'm stuck in a catch 22 where I want to get absolutely trashed to make it through each evening with my sanity intact, but am afraid to do so in case drunk me finally loses the inhibitions that prevent me from telling her to fuck off.

Twenty minutes?! Truly you are a God among men.

I regret that I have but one upvote to give to this comment.

Did you try flushing anyway? If you're operating under the assumption that your coworkers are all civilized human beings, you're just setting yourself up for disappointment.

From what I've heard, and from what I know about similar scam operations in an unrelated field, they use a combination of really aggressive telemarketers a shared list of lonely/easily manipulated elderly people to make most of their money. I've heard of families that have had to take away an elderly relative's…

It's never too late for that.

Lazy times here as well. One of the nice parts about supervising a competent and relatively self-sufficient staff is that I have occasional days where I basically just sit around waiting for somebody to have a problem I need to deal with.

It's about time they fired his ass. He doesn't even dub silly voices over the videos like Bob Saget used to do.

I'm pretty certain that was the best analogy his frustrated staffers could come up with when they were attempting to explain the whole internet thing to him. I imagine them starting off trying to explain it intelligently and gradually working their way down to "Look, it's like a bunch of tubes…"

Wait, I've got one now. The Canceraids store called. They're running out of YOU!

Dang, I was sorta hoping we weren't. I don't really have any clever ways to wish canceraids on you ready to go.

I'm still relatively new at commenting on the AV Club. Are we still doing canceraids?

Great job, broadcast television?

Anybody ever see The Witches? That movie really messed me up as a kid.

I've always been partial to the kind that crosses the line from semi-solid to full liquid. I get this great sense of accomplishment that I've taken my diarrhea as far to the extreme as I can.

I, for one, never want to get off this free blood and marrow gravy train. @avclub-e5e75678d9346d88878b7c95b97eac68:disqus 's liver is looking pretty nice too. I call dibs!