AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Except for all the times that he abused Dave, made snide jokes about Mr. James behind his back, annoyed the hell out of Lisa, etc. I could have bought Bill seeming to suck up to Johnny while trying to undermine him, but wholeheartedly embracing him? Eh, maybe. Who knows.

Sorry, I don't have time to watch fucking Glenn Beck all the time, in hopes of satisfying some random A.V. Club commenter who has very specific tastes when it comes to superficial, half-assed Glenn Beck gimmick comments. Which was sort of the point.

"an untitled project from former MADtv players Keegan-Michael Key and Jordan Peele"
Sorry, but if it's not Debra Wilson, Michael McDonald, Will Sasso or Frank Caliendo I have no idea who anyone on MADtv is.

I for one don't want any Party Down. I sort of feel as though the TV series ended perfectly, with Adam Scott auditioning for his dream role. They didn't show him GETTING IT, which would have been so out of character for the show, but instead realizing that trying to get it is what he needs to do to keep himself alive.

You call that a gimmick? That is no gimmick, my friend. Your recent filmic output is a gimmick, this is HARDLY ANYTHING AT ALL! You think you can get away with this? Well, I've got news for you, you pinko Hollywood lefty snooze, WE SURROUND YOU! And we get much more comments on our posts than you. So why don't you…

What, no review of my movie?
To go along with my multiple standup tours, my two books this year (and another next year), and my $18 mil a year salary from Fox?

Okay, okay
So, the Twilight sequel is here.

It was a pretty great show, with a second season that vastly improved on the first and that raised the stakes gradually and deliberately.

I'd love to try to sell a Volvo
The only thing is, all my sponsors bailed out on me. Something I said?

Happy Feet was a communist movie
Glad to see it wasn't nominated again.

Oh, so they watch my show!

I've got an idea for a show on the teevee
How 'bout giving me another hour a day?

Sing it, Elton!

Avoid this film!
I believe that those two adorable children in the photo have a deep-seated hatred of white people and white culture.

We don't need to wait until 2012
Because the world is ALREADY ENDING! I mean, I don't know if any of you care about this. You can all just go about your day if you don't. Eat a pretzel. But don't come crying to me when OBAMA RELEASES ALL OF THE WORLD'S ELEPHANTS IN TEXAS! The signs are all there! Those elephants are…

It's just because they don't work hard enough.
What I said.

I'm actually a born-again Mormon.

How dare you, sir!
People like you, O'Neal—you SURROUND us, with your labored snark and your "integrity". There's nothing more American than bullshitting and collecting a fat paycheck. Shit, look at Wall Street! Or SCIENCE!

Here's a question
Any of you wonder about why Heroes stays on the air long after its ratings don't support it? Are you beginning to wonder whether there's a conspiracy to infantilize television for the rest of us? And have you wondered, like I have, whether Barack Obama is behind this?