I feel like I should say something here, but honestly I'm just drawing a blank *speeds away on light cycle*

Tundra. We're the frozen tundra wastelands, at least the edges of it.

He would've said something about Ted Cruz's father, but that would have been weird given the conspiracy that Trump believes he assassinated Kennedy with a bullet shot from the moon.

If I was Tom Hanks I'd see what crimes I could away with until I got arrested. Nothing like violent or sexual in nature (except public indecency).

Is this English?

How much pea soup can one person eat in a sitting?

"Cho will play Andrew Kim, a former child…"

Ahem, I think it would be more accurate to say mercury poisoning as that affects cognitive functions more heavily

Okay, well you say that as a joke but I would pay at least double the admission price of a regular theater ticket to watch that. Especially if you replace Hagrid with young Magneto.

Ouch. Did you inspect her hand for a ring first? Always do that before you think of engaging in any courtship with someone, easy and instant way to tell if your efforts will be in vain.

I read that as he waved to you and then he said "I'm ready to die." Just pure misery in that man's life every day or something.

I mean I can kill computer programs from within the machines with my mad skillz, but I'm not God.

Scarlet Witch is two people?

Well he really butchered "nepotism" in the headline, there's not even a 'c' or 'u' in that word.

Well yeah, I guess I'm saying any ape driven society with a bunch of different species. They won't be able to fuck their way out of existence the way we did with some of the lesser hominids.

Understandable, I couldn't think of anything clever. Something with Simpsons quotes wanting to get off the planet of the apes, etc.

I mentioned this before, but this all ape society is doomed to be caste driven. For all of humanity's faults, prejudices, and frailties, at least we can all fuck one another and produce viable offspring.

Oh good there's three of us. Looks like we'll have to repopulate the AV Club after that monkey virus killed everyone else.

Is it only us two?

WELL SAID!