Okay but if they were serious, they'd replace their hemoglobin with chlorophyll like me. Now if you'll excuse me typing this out expend all the energy I've made in the past 7 months, time to sit in the sun for another decade.

"I was elected to represent the citizens of Geneva, Alabama, not Geneva, Switzerland," Trump said between bouts of electrocuting the children of a captured POW with a rusty car battery.

James Bond… is a Nazi?!

I have the amazing ability to delineate violent acts of fiction or re-enactments of historical events and the actual damaging effects that guns have in real life. It's possible to have both strict fun policies and gratuitous gun violence in entertainment, I mean it's not like James Bond beats people with a billy club…

Well that pile of gold will not be going to friends of the GOP, so obviously we can't have that.

Hey, hey, my childish vote went to the Communist Party, not Jill Stein!

When we're eating delicious coal on a per meal basis and the rest of the world is stuck starving to death trying to eat nutrient lacking sunlight, you'll be begging our glorious Emperor Trump for forgiveness. Mmm… TASTY TASTY TRUMP COAL™!

Did you trade dates for each film I hope, to liven up your relationships?

Did you drop acid and have sex with strangers, though? That was 90% of the appeal!

I still make sure to mention how great it is to people who bring up the SNL skits.

I saw Back to the Future in the movie theater, in 1955!

I had no idea what it was about either, just that it got good reviews. It was an eminently enjoyable movie experience.

What are you talking about?

Oh if only he hadn't called for help on this comment board, someone might have been able to help him

So beautiful… They should have sent a poet.

*Trump watches The Day After, immediately scrambles to launch nuclear weapons*

This is the most disconcerting part, "sorry we couldn't save your loved one after the accident, our blood bank is all out of blood from selling it to rich idiots for dubious and unfounded health reasons. Sure your child could have lived a full life but that would have taken hours, theoretical hours off of some overly…

Hey did you just repost this article with a different name and expect us not to notice? I'M NO LONGER DANCING, I AM POUTING.

Will the theme be the opening of Megadeth's Trust?

Covfefe to popular belief, the meme will be everlasting