If I hear "Objection, sustained" one more time, I think I'm going to scream!

Friday Night: Went to the theater with my mother to see Burt Wonderstone. This might get me tarred and feathered, but I really enjoyed it. Sure, the plot was predictable, but the jokes made me laugh, the cast was excellent, and I'm a sucker for "human cartoon" Jim Carrey. Enjoyable "night out" movie. Watched The…

I think the word you're looking for is "Lizi".

"And Brad, you're my Greg Proops."

Kate Mara's a pretty lady. She looks nice in that dress.

"For Christ's sake, Derek. I'm a coal miner, not a professional film and television actor."

Let's take a moment to mourn the recent losses from Netflix Instant. The Larry Sanders Show. Peep Show. Harold and Maude. Monty Python's Flying Circus. Just watched Kramer vs. Kramer since that's disappearing on Friday. I also need to watch Bronson, 'cause that's going away on the 11th.

Jon Glaser, in character as "Jon".

Most of my weekend was spent on my rewatch of Freaks and Geeks. Never gets old. I'd forgotten, however, just how fucking devastating that episode where Sam, Bill, and Niel learn that Niel's dad is having an affair was. Sam running up to his dad crying and hugging him after getting the Atari was the breaking point for…

CUE GODZILLA THEME

He can just Bing it.

It would either be awesome or horrifying when we saw him as Quvenzhane Wallis.

Oh, wow, that Simpsons episode made me tear up remembering it.

Mark Duplass was also kind of a surprise.

Oh, and I'm not even kidding here: after I made that comment, I put on "Country Feedback" with my iPod on shuffle, then the next track was "Needle in the Hay" by Elliot Smith, followed by "How to Disappear Completely" by Radiohead.

With that line, I think Amy Poehler's career came full circle, given that the very first episode of her very first TV series (Upright Citizen's Brigade) featured a sketch where she played a girl scout who befriended the Unabomber.

That scene in the Season 4 Halloween Party episode where April rips off his Velcro Mr. Potato Head smile and sticks it back on upside-down when he sees Chris and Millicent making out nearly gave me a stroke.

Thanks, man. What is this, Chocolate Yoo-Hoo?

Yeah, I watched Jurassic Bark for the first time while I was at a hotel with a group of friends. They all went down to the pool while I stayed in the room and watched Futurama on Netflix. I did kind of an awkward run-stumble into the shower when I heard them coming back, so they wouldn't see or ask why I'd been…

I can't even comprehend the level of sad that would create. I'm guessing it would end with me listening to R.E.M's "Country Feedback" on repeat before throwing myself into the sea.