Bollocks
I was expecting it to be a seemingly endless parade of shit, but I wasn't expecting scrotum jokes.

West Sussex? Hardy country?
My ass!

Whenever I go on an Amazonian swinning trip, I just seal up all my orifices with caulk. Delicious caulk.

Had your teacher invited you on a "swimming trip" at this stage?

Just after they say 'Action,' usually.

Donkey Kong was, apparently, designed to familiarise kids with the Scopes monkey trial. Man, that monkey fucked up that courtroom.

My wife thought the kid was Boone, but I can't remember anything about his upbringing from S1, so its probably wrong.

Its best to play as Spielberg - halfway through you can make your excuses and leave.