The bigger issue, Neckbeard, is what it makes the rest of you when a monkey is the most logical one in the room.

What Hyundai commercials are you talking about? All I ever see are those damn Ford ads with Mike Rowe.

This is the same crap we went through with Malcolm McLaren. Everybody filled the comment boards complaining about the lack of an obit, then it was revealed that (surprise?) the staff wanted to do a thorough job and make a fitting article about it. If you just wanted a one-line "he is dead" item, well, I think you…

For me it was Andrea's gun making a crazy sound when she swung it in a quarter-turn. I want to say it was the sound of a sword being drawn, which is all poetic and all, but a gun isn't going to make some crazy metallic scream from waving it around.

HOLY SHIT
Ho…ly…Shit….

Pocket Pool
"Homeland Insecurity, about 'bumbling airport security workers'"

Joke's on you - you're not looking at boobs! You're just looking at a screen!

I'm sorry, the correct answer was "Fucking Faster. Faster! Fuck it!"

My spell check suggests "catheterizing"

They're marketing this with her tits? Damn, the movie posters where you live are a LOT better than the ones here.

A Haiku
Hey, are you homeless?
I wrote a book about you!
Well, have a nice day.

I say "avoision"

They Strike Again
Starkillers….

I'm interested in hearing Marky Mark's tips for gerbil care.

The lady on the right looks like she's genuinely having fun.
The one on the left is desperately thinking "Oh no, he's staring at my ass again, isn't he? I can't be alone with him. Smile! No, I can't let him get me alone again. Smile for the cameras! Shit, how many shows was that contact for? I wonder how much it would…

I used to have a Dick Button, but it kept getting infected so I took it out. It also set off metal detectors.

Take a dump, it's in your rump…

The Nerds Have Confused Me
There's already a Buffy the Vampire Slayer movie written by Joss Whedon. Are people upset because they actively want another one written by him or because they don't want another one if it isn't?

As Shih Tzu said, there is a difference between perfect pitch and being able to sing in tune. Most of the performances I've seen on the show have messed up both the rhythm and the key of the vocals, so I'd like to at least clean up one part of that.

Mmmmmmm
"…new 'challenges' thrown at the singers by the producers."