That's because you're not at Hooters, you're just drinking at work again.

No.

The musical genre, or the mutated rhinoceros?

Anybody need a hype-man?

So you're a waffle man, eh?

How about a muffin?

Howdy doodily doo! Faces are great and all, but it can't match the personality of your very own chirpy breakfast companion!

You could at least buy me dinner first. Let's go to Waffle House!

Pffft. I could rap circles around this guy.

In my adaptation, Paul has to stick his hand in a toaster.

Seriously. It's a one-note schtick. I, on the other hand, can offer waffles, toast, bagels, muffins, scones and all other manner of warmed breakfast breads!

Howdy doodily doo! We need love, but it needs to be the right kind of love! Don't just go jamming your french toast sticks in my slot and telling me I like it! Sometimes 'no' means 'no toast!'

Hungry for toast! Am I right? Who wants a scone!?

Howdy doodily doo! You know, sometimes I feel a little 'used' at my job! I mean people hand over their bread, and then stuff their french toast sticks in my slot, and… I'm losing it here. Long story short, your mum's a whore!

It's on!
That oven is a fuckin' amateur! I was toasting before he we plugged in! I bet he can't even do waffles.

Howdy doodily doo, your chirpy breakfat companion back again! Did one of you guys ask for some delicious toast!? How about a muffin?

Whoa! How do you like that howdy-doodily-doo! Hulk, I'm no prude, but could you please keep a closer eye on your brother?

And then, in the final act… CANTALOUPE! What a twist! I'd sign up for that, and I'd be happy to offer my singing, dancing, and toasting services to any interested directors. Just don't expect me to sleep with you first, ha-ha!

Howdy doodily doo! I just thought I'd pop in and see if I could interest you in some delicious jam or jelly for that toast! Or, perhaps the only better topping, another piece of toast!

Woah, woah woah. Back up- there's a CLUB now!? Why was I not informed? Can I join!? I don't need to be president or anything. Is there an Undersecretary of Eggos yet?