God, I want to sick my comma between some sexy clauses.

"Your Aunt is Touching Herself Because of This Right Now"

"Your Aunt is Touching Herself Because of This Right Now"

Are they the one's responsible for the "This Aint [fill in movie/TV show]" films?  I would look it up were I not in public right now.

Are they the one's responsible for the "This Aint [fill in movie/TV show]" films?  I would look it up were I not in public right now.

@LJo1:disqus Yes, but as a Cubs fan I would assume that you're also a Bulls fan, so there's 6 championships you had in the '90s.  If you're old enough, you saw the Bears win the Super Bowl in the '80s.  The Cubs may be the poster child for franchise futility, but the city of Cleveland takes the overall award.

@LJo1:disqus Yes, but as a Cubs fan I would assume that you're also a Bulls fan, so there's 6 championships you had in the '90s.  If you're old enough, you saw the Bears win the Super Bowl in the '80s.  The Cubs may be the poster child for franchise futility, but the city of Cleveland takes the overall award.

Haven't you heard?  Children are the future.

Haven't you heard?  Children are the future.

As a Cleveland sports fan, no one even comes close to us in terms of sucking.  No one.  Please don't take this away from us, its all we have.

As a Cleveland sports fan, no one even comes close to us in terms of sucking.  No one.  Please don't take this away from us, its all we have.

I don't know if their disappointing that much.  With the suspensions and everything, I think most people expected this to be a down season for them.

I don't know if their disappointing that much.  With the suspensions and everything, I think most people expected this to be a down season for them.

The goddamned Celts are ruining this site!

The goddamned Celts are ruining this site!

Who says we can't punch all of them?

Who says we can't punch all of them?

Bonus Fact: I just discovered that his middle name is King.  The man should be hung from a flag poll by his underwear so that we may laugh at him.

Bonus Fact: I just discovered that his middle name is King.  The man should be hung from a flag poll by his underwear so that we may laugh at him.

Eyebrow-less Jared Leto is genuinely terrifying.