"av staff members with lots of free time" seems redundant.

that law is a travesty.

you wouldn't hit a guy with glasses, would ya?

shouldn't we let the market decide if vaccines cause retardation?

i would have gone with Crazy Train.  it gets the message across, but it's popular enough that, if you want, you can play coy and not get in trouble.

i don't think it was ever established that Mario is American.  in fact, i'm a little confused as to whether Mario is an Italian national or just Italian in ethnicity.

"we've got a file on you" is pretty similar to song 2.