It would be terrifying because the child lived instead of being crushed to death.  There is that better?  Please tell me how you guffawed at the tornado news.

Could you use it in a sentence?

Fook dat shit!

I keep getting younger… oh wait I got that wrong.

Imagine the side of a house falling over during a windstorm, but instead of Buster Keaton miraculously surviving because he was standing where an open window was, it was a small crying child.  It wouldn't be funny, it would be terrifying.

That's a punchline.

Don't blame me, blame Arpanet.

Well, you've got to get some decent sleep before the big meeting!

I remember Don Jon from Miami Vice.

Don't get me started on Vince Vaughn!

When are they going to get to Wally World?

She looks way past her expiration date and is well into the territory of somebody's mom who can kind of look hot for an office party and maybe you'd want to hit on her if you were real drunk but then again why create problems?

You could be onto something.  He keeps getting hired because he looks like an ordinary guy, and a lot of "comedies" feature ordinary guys put in crazy situations because fuck that's funny to some people I guess so even if he was funny the characters he plays have their uniqueness or humor sucked sucked out of them so…

Comedy comes from character.  Replace a deadpan Buster Keaton with a crying child in many of his classic bits and they just aren't funny.

They teased me with her tits on Wanderlust and I won't be tit teased again tit.

The sooner you start obsessing about it, the sooner you can get over your disappointment when it's canceled.

Sorry.  My bad.

I'll tell you who has to go.  OBAMA!

Okay, we all admit the monkey was not top of his graduating class at Harvard medical school.  But it was Harvard, dammit!

Whenever he would do open heart surgery, some of his fecal matter would get in the stitches.