What am I and who am I doing here?

With CGI spit.

Making friends can be tough for those of us who aren't horny midgets.

Not to everyone it would seem.  This exchange just took place on a friend of mine's Facebook page:

Indeed, @avclub-a1967e6de4ca99fb2635d94b99453928:disqus, the stingrays probably didn't even bet on themselves.

Once again Obama is proving through his knowledge of pop culture that he's a champion of the common man.  He likes Omar so he's just like me!

What happened to you, China?  You used to be cool.

I remember being confused by this article.  Edible Arrangements are delicious and awesome.

Пошел на хуй.

I was very disappointed, as well.  The only saving grace was that Barney prompted me to investigate videos of walruses masturbating.  Highly amusing.

In my home, the Puppy Bowl is forbidden.

But he's not the hero we deserve.

I'm sure he and Keith Moon are having quite a time of it in heaven/hell/wherever they are.

I don't know if this is going out on a limb, but could the idea for a low-cal calzone be a showbiz throwback to The Honeymooners?  In one episode Alice is reminding Ralph of all of the bad ideas he's had, among which is an idea for "no-cal pizza."

Mind = blown.

And Barney is the Man in Black.

Well, @avclub-f2b489efd726db529335e31c83509c73:disqus , it would be fitting if it was Robin, as just about everyone else has already tapped that.

Would be funnier if he met her by way of:

Which end is going to go in first?

Another Festivus miracle!