ALWAYS LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE OF LIFE

Frankly, no, the world doesn't suck that much, i.e. to the extent that the average man wouldn't miss an opportunity to rape someone and nobody ever dies of natural causes.

Whatever, Mrs. Figg.

George R.R. Martin is solidly on my mental list of authors who don't know how much is too much. In one of the books Dany hears about how the emotionless eunuch slaves of Bloody and Decadent Oriental City Number Whatever are trained by having to go into the street, take a baby out of its mother's arms, and kill it in…

You will, man-in-the-moon-man, you will.

"It's a foreign movie… it's a film, is what it is."

I watched Fish Tank on Megavideo. It was grainy, it was subtitled in French, and I had to break for lunch, but by God, I picked my own aspect ratio.

Nah. Look at him, he's clearly an Auton.

Watch QI.

I feel you could better serve humanity by fucking yourself.

Mormons don't like coffee either.

Superfreakypeople1 wrote a line of that comment for every dove released by that lady outside the courthouse for every count of child molestation of which Michael Jackson was found not guilty.

On Twitter a while back, Stephen Colbert congratulated the Packers and the Steelers for being "credits to the defunct professions that are your namesakes," or something like that.

I don't know what you mean… it's not as if he's supposed to have died in the past of his own timeline. He's a time traveler. At any time throughout the show, he might have died at whatever point in history, and it wouldn't have erased the things he'd done in his own past that took place chronologically after that…

I rewatched "Turn Left" a little while ago and almost burst into tears at the part where the news reports Sarah Jane's death in the hospital from "Smith and Jones."

Since you mention Shakespeare in Love… there's a line in there that I think is pretty great, when Viola-in-disguise asks Will to describe his love for Viola, and he says, "Like a sickness and its cure together." But then it slightly ruins it by having Viola add, "Like rain and sun… like cold and heat," which makes it…

Great big gobs of greasy grimy gopher guts.
Simulated monkey sex.
Chopped-up Nubian ibex.

Iiii'm gonna sit at the welcome taaable, sing about it, I'm! gonna sit at the welcome table one o' these days, hallelujah! Iiii'm….

God, you're fucking shameless. The word "film" comes up twice in that article: once as a specific example of the kind of violation they're talking about (Little Airplane swine-flu girl) and once saying that film is the industry most associated with unpaid internships but that others are jumping on the bandwagon, which…

Do you think "the unemployment rate" is a naturally occurring phenomenon unaffected by factors such as, I don't know, unpaid internships that should be someone's paying job? You're right, enforcing (not creating) regulations that force companies to actually hire employees if they want them will probably not result in…