Water my ass! Get this guy some Pepto Bismol!

Water my ass! Get this guy some Pepto Bismol!

And yet every shitty bar and soft rock station in America is still going to beat "Brown Eyed Girl" to death. I hate that fucking song.

And yet every shitty bar and soft rock station in America is still going to beat "Brown Eyed Girl" to death. I hate that fucking song.

Of all the souls I've encountered in the galaxy, his was the most…human.

The sports team from my area is SUPERIOR to the sports team from your area.

The sports team from my area is SUPERIOR to the sports team from your area.

There is only one law. HIS LAW! *machine gun fire*

There is only one law. HIS LAW! *machine gun fire*

RUN.

RUN.

Thanks for the update, TMZ—I mean—AV CLUB. Jesus.

Thanks for the update, TMZ—I mean—AV CLUB. Jesus.

Yeah, but where the fuck is The Long Walk? Frank Darabont, I'm looking in your direction. Remake all the bad King mini-series movies after someone gets the fucking LONG WALK done first. Please.

Yeah, but where the fuck is The Long Walk? Frank Darabont, I'm looking in your direction. Remake all the bad King mini-series movies after someone gets the fucking LONG WALK done first. Please.

It was a major return to form for most of Season 4, finale excluded.

It was a major return to form for most of Season 4, finale excluded.

Milton Bradley's got a def one it's a Twister! Twister! Twister! 
YEAH! All the girls and homeboys playin' Twister! Twister! Twister!
YEAH! Spin the spinner and call the shot!
TWISTER ties you up in a knot! 
That's twist-errr-rrr! Yeah Twister!

Milton Bradley's got a def one it's a Twister! Twister! Twister! 
YEAH! All the girls and homeboys playin' Twister! Twister! Twister!
YEAH! Spin the spinner and call the shot!
TWISTER ties you up in a knot! 
That's twist-errr-rrr! Yeah Twister!

It was the best-worst Christmas day film I've ever seen.