Late as usual, but I also want Betty White as my grandma. Only I think I want the Rose Nylund version. That dumb scandanavian schtick worked its way right into my heart and settled there.

Goldmeister: playing along or too short for this one?

I'm also too lazy to spell check.

Grant like's anal and brownies, eh? I'm lazy, so I'll let this joke write itself.

I'm a few days late on this, but wtf. Is Hitler's dick currency? How's the dollar doing in comparison?

Throw a couple of scars and some white paint on him, and MPG looks like the Joker in that show. He has sanitarium inmate hair. As a public defender, you can't say he isn't…committed.

As a wigmaker, I face the horrors of hair all day. Hair and fake scalps. And styrofoam heads. And I need an escape. Enter avclub.

Damn, Assneck. I check in here to escape my job for a few minutes, and you just threw me smack dab back into it. Not cool, man.

Don't call yourself that.

No, no, scotteb. Now you're doing it just because I asked you to. It just…it just doesn't feel like you mean it anymore. *sniffle…sob*

Sorry, that should be "losing steam."

And on an unrelated note:

How does one build up immunity to Jefferson Starship? Exposure to small amounts over a long period of time? Or did you do the isolation booth in Best Buy, too?

mmm, whatch…mmm, whatch…mmm, whatchya saaaay?

I meant Sedaris and Cohen short stories up there, not essays. Does it matter? Prolly not.

In full agreement on A Separate Peace. It made 10th grade English pretty unbearable.

Why the hell didn't I stay on avclub instead of taking my kid to the doctor?! Priorities…I need to get some.

Wow. You've named it? Like, with captial letters and everything? It must be really bad. My condolences, Quirk.

Swamp ass sounds so harsh, though. I'll stick with swamp butt.

Swass is a new one. I always called it "swamp butt." It rolls off the tongue better. Uh…ew.