It's impossible that that room was full of public defenders. There are only two kinds of public defence lawyers: skinny ones whose jackets are too big and fat ones whose jackets are too small.

While the kids at the cool table are talking about naked women snipers, I'd like to point out that in the image accompanying this article, NBC used the Gotham font while you've edited it with the Futura font which only bears a passing resemblance to Gotham.

I can't help but feel that this season's inclusion of Kitty as a character cuts against the dry, rapid-fire tone which made me enjoy this series in the first place.

Near the end of the day, everyone gets pushed into the Rose Garden so Alan Alda and Jimmy Smits have more room to grudgingly respect each other.

I wear butt-crack jewelry at all times specifically so if someone calls me boring, I can turn around and half-moon them. My dazzling diamondesque fashion statement dangling discreetly but alluringly above my plunging buttline proves them wrong every time. "Whaddya think of this, ya big hunk of man?" I waggle…

"Don't worry, Chumley. He's just jealous because your smile is permanent, and his only comes when he's happy."

The monstrousness of your wrongness is breathtaking.

'This Lovely Horse Is Very Small, But That Lovely Horse Is Far Away'

El Gort for Present Dent 2000

This is the album I am most ashamed to have memorized. (Second is To The Extreme.)

Is there a TV show that makes having children look like a good decision? Because it seems there are a lot that display parenthood as the seventh circle of hell. The latter is probably not far from the truth, but surely there's some variety in how it's portrayed.

That cover looks like it was designed by a community college student who was just doing his best.

It's a widow thing, you wouldn't understand

Uh, his name is Henry Jennings

Glee is a sandpit for unhinged teenage overconfidence. DayGlo is their beige.

That's pretty much what open-world games are for. Sometimes I just drive around in GTA:SA and listen to the radio, occasionally sideswiping cyclists and looking for sweet jumps.

I got 99 assistants but James ain't 1

I diagnose each case I see,
from DSM-II and DSM-III.

"Gimp's asleep."
"Well, I guess you better have to go wake hem up naw, won't you."
"No, no… I'm awake. I was just thinkin' about stuff."

It is — such a great sketch. And the teleprompter sketch you're thinking of is "Wake Up and Smile" from the same episode.