"Teen rapper Kitty Pryde"

CALL THE LAWYERS

You know your movie's bad when you're resurrecting the shtick Friedburg and Selzter gave up a few years ago.

You could in Ohio, apparently.

Dude makes Steve Harvey look funny.

Hey, at least this movie has a personality.

God fucking dammit. Will someone please pay Andy Daly's rent so shit like this can stop happening?

…one of?

…how did she get HOTTER? I thought having a baby ruined women like that.

I see Obama's white half will be governing the second half of his presidency…

Ron Paul's inauguration would have consisted of 3 million smug 28 year olds yelling at you for the very idea of wasting any government resources on something like an inauguration.

Sweet dreams and flying machines flying safely through the air…

Hypothetical performers for the canceled Romney inauguration:

Dude, I positively loathe that we live in a world without Schraderbrau.

…and it's awesome!

Um… Cali/Belgie? Their Enjoy By ____ beers? Hell, even their Saison du Buff is pretty solid.

GOVERNMENT WARNING: May cause birth defects in pregnant women, rob your friends of making memories together.

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Kitten Mitton Wittbier

You want me to grab your fainting couch?