OH THANK GOD

I think we can all agree this is a MASSIVE downgrade.

Jade was a brilliant satire of sexuality vs. violence in blah blah blah

Right up there with Stephen King claiming (you know, a few years later) that he intentionally made the worst movie he possibly could in Maximum Overdrive as some sort comment on, or tribute to, something or other…yeah, sure.

Uh…Kevin Bacon?

Fucking A right. People can squawk Verhoeven all they want (and really folks, he makes fun movies but gets credit for being a lot more clever than he really is), but Eszterhas wrote the script - so we know the score.

So, what would be, like, the other four of the top five satires on American sexuality?

Yes. Although Cleghorne! seems to have dismissed itself without any lasting harm, so maybe there was something more noxious that could have been chosen in that case…

I'm actually an aircraft enthusiast, which means - for me at least - that was not the worst flick they ever did.

Creeping Terror is the giant vagina beast that eats women one. Oh, and no soundtrack, but a narrator.

I'm not feline this humor at all.

I am sympathetic, but that is slightly mitigated by her apparently doing something that she obviously shouldn't have been doing. Fuck, I'd be scared with the window up.

The sheeple will tell you no, but we know the truth.

Well, I saw the Saw Doctors…

I'm guessing dragon's breath fire is a big part of the creation process…either that, or it's in the books, I forgot, and I only think I'm guessing.

Probably…

If Tommen was a sport (and realistic about his abilities), he'd have coughed his up to Jaime. Although if I recall, it's a smaller version…

That is the only good one, alas.

On a somewhat related note, Asia's Alpha. It was like they were attempting to overwhelm with awesomeness, but my reaction was along the lines of, "What's point of all this shit?"" Very busy and silly.

One gets the sinking feeling that we are getting into make-it-up-as-we-go-along territory, never a good sign. Remind me not to complain that Martin at least has as much time as he needs/wants to think this shit over. I guess I'll how the season turns out, I owe them that much. Here's hoping…