Prince Charles?

Eh, not gonna click.

If there were, say, a sarcastic puppet on your hand casting aspersions on his character in a high-pitched voice, who's to say you were to blame?

He's decent, upright, smart and good-looking on the inside.

Why even hold the election on Opposite Day?

Really? I mean, that's entirely between you and your personal code, but we're going to actively need some conservative voters and non-voters to reconsider their life choices. Particularly by the 2018 elections. I'd be willing to allow them a way to save face if it led to a pragmatic solution to the current…

Flash Gordon's Theme.

We nerds go to bars as well. We're, like, barring all the time.

Picture this with a Queen song paying in the background.

Exactly.

With "Flight of the Valkyries" playing in the background.

"Not-zis"?

Remember, your grandparent's generation also gave us the fez-wearing Shriners, so their perspective on what's tacky may not line up with yours.

Ugh, you're worse than Lutherans!

*hands Guy a melon with a hole in it*

At which point Adam Sandler takes picture of his beach house from his wallet and smile proudly.

"Daddy made a lot of crazy promises to some very racist people."

Just keep a hot shower ready for afterward.

Oh, man. Seriously?

Same things goes for licenses to ill. I'm no longer welcome at the local Department of Licensing.