Or it could be about a musical prodigy who rides a fixie through Manhattan as he's chased by Robin Williams and be called PREMIUM AUGUST RUSH.

DIVERTHIFYYY

DIVERTHIFYYY

All you need now is a six-pack, a bottle of melatonin, a bucket of chicken, and some hookers, and you'll be all set!

All you need now is a six-pack, a bottle of melatonin, a bucket of chicken, and some hookers, and you'll be all set!

To be fair to your brain, a roast beef is definitely solvable.

To be fair to your brain, a roast beef is definitely solvable.

But i LOVE my own fartz!!111!!1

Canter girl get a break around here?!

Pam's becoming the regular with the most interesting backstory and hobbies.

Think you could — think you could — think you could bench press a Scion tC?

I believe the preferred epithet regarding Drake is "goofnugget." An acceptable alternate appellation is "the softest motherfucker in hip hop."

I'm parting my 'do.

Inspecto Myscrotum!

I fucked around and got a triple-double one time when I was in middle school. Of course, I was playing against fifth graders on the elementary school court, the baskets of which were set at like seven feet. Maybe that's what Cube was up to on 1/20/92.

Hell yeah, Lincoln's Repeater. I was astounded at the lethality of that weapon. Pure elegance.

Nah, @avclub-c32c385098594487a303db83e33f2ea1:disqus . We like it here. So get off our lawn, you young, unmarried, refreshingly earnest, yet-to-be-broken-by-the-grinding-wheel-of-life punk.

Yeah. It's also a spider.

Tell us more!

"I didn't name my band after an animal …"