Luckily, I live in the Central time zone, so there's a chance the show might be over before midnight here.

They're doing director now? Well, we'll know what is likely to win Picture after this, depending if it goes to Miller or Inarritu.

So, since I still haven't seen Room…it's basically a super-serious version of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, right?

Er, Ali G.

By all means, let's bring on Borat to introduce the movie about kidnapping victims!

Since I'm gay, I can't really be too upset with a winner declaring his homosexuality and dedicating the award to the GLBT community…but still…the song really sucked.

Holy crap…Sam Smith is halfway to the EGOT instead!!!

Wow…I guess Lady Gaga won't get halfway to the EGOT tonight…but really…that song?

Well, at least they played a few seconds of the other two instead of just having Common talk over it.

And the nominees are…the three songs you've heard and two we don't really care about.

So are we going to actually get to hear anything from the other two nominated songs?

So if this song wins, Gaga will be halfway to the EGOT. I wish I could have taken a bet on that a few years ago.

So they bring on the Vice President of the United States to introduce a performance by Lady Gaga?

Joe Biden? What has he starred in?

Ahh…there's the annual Holocaust win!

I think Sofia is her Modern Family character.

Foreign language film as well…though I think that's coming up right now.

Jacob Tremblay might be adorable, but he needed a better microphone.

They could have shown a clip from Good Burger…

Oh no…why do they always have someone singing over the In Memoriam segment?