You have four years to live.
Mine went more like OHHHHH NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO.
Oh, that was your girlfriend? See, you got to her just after I got to her, and I got to her just after eating a whole box of cookies. Sorry about the misunderstanding.
If we're going to talk about fat jokes, how about some love for the national sport of San Whatever?
Nah, that would be the national sport of the small island nation in "A Night at the Opera and a Day at the Races." I practically fell off my chair.
Charley has a point. As is typical of promiscuous species, we human males try to thwart our sexual successors by creating a "soft plug" of semen in our partners' cervixes, quite literally cockblocking, or at least sperm-blocking, any subsequent sexual partners. However, the human schlong is perfectly structured to…
Too far ahead of its time? The take-home message from the Virtual Boy is that no one wants to be seen in public wearing this lump of plastic and silicon that looks like a prop from a 50's alien movie. If I saw you wearing one of those on the bus to work, even I'd steal your lunch money. The VB was unmistakably a…
That's "Kill Switch OR FBS."
Holy shit. We are discussing, quite literally, the only two episodes I refused to watch all the way through. I mean, I watched Lord of the Flies and the Brady Bunch one from beginning to end, but not Kill Switch of FPS.
So is it a remake of The Undefeated, the largely forgotten 1969 John Wayne western? I suppose it's fitting that Palin, the professional caricature of bull-headed redneck idealism, would rip off John Wayne. I wonder if she realizes she's more like Rock Hudson's character, the former Confederate officer who kept…
But Homi, it's not nice to maul Ranger Ned.
YOU WANT A PIECE OF THIS, BART-BART?!??
Also, @Jiminy Cricket: in Dr. No, Q's predecessor made a big stink over how Bond's old .25-caliber Beretta was underpowered despite fitting nicely in a "woman's handbag," and how his shiny new PPK had "delivery like a brick through a plate-glass window." I've long wondered what Beretta did to offend the producers.
I thought Shrimp Days at Red Lobster only came once a year!
I always figured Bond acquired a taste for vodka martinis during all his time in Russia. I imagine during the Cold War, vodka would have a sort of exoticism and forbidden-fruit allure that fit the character, although not having been alive at the time I don't know. Now, in any case, it's just an insult to his manhood.
List: 5/10, plus bits & pieces of two more
Opposite list: 0/6
I miss Videocracy too. Even if 95% of the videos destroyed my faith in humanity— okay, prevented me from developing any faith in humanity— the other 5% brought me joy. Kittens! Blenders! Nut shots!
@ Robuttnik, 10:43 AM
But Nibbler heat-blasted it off my butt! I wanna stress that part!!!
I can do more than talk. I can pontificate!
My doom-proof platinum vest absorbed most of the radiation! In retrospect I wish I'd been wearing doom-proof pants, but…you know us nudists.