Gnome singing Rihanna's "Where Have You Been" Liberace-style!

Gnome singing Rihanna's "Where Have You Been" Liberace-style!

Dude had seven sons, how many more balls do you need in a musical, Cole Porter?

Dude had seven sons, how many more balls do you need in a musical, Cole Porter?

Counting orgasms, cracking brulee!
These are all my jours tristees!

Counting orgasms, cracking brulee!
These are all my jours tristees!

Owwwwwuhhhh…….

That's okay, Scrawler. I remember my Mom once telling me ten years ago that she just wanted to sit in a room and stare at Angelina Jolie.

I was even just talking about that fakey Brit accent Americans do for "classical theater." Like, "affected American"? She can't even do that.

Damn, you're on fire today.

*starts a round of applause in your honor*

Harley Quinn?

*rolls up skirt*
*wears nylon knee-highs instead of wool*
*kohl eyeliner*
Yeah girrrrrrrrrrl.

Thou bottled spider, thou bunbacked toad.

I hope so.

Or Richard III, with Aaron Paul as Catesby.
"Malmsey me, bitch!"

Kelly Macdonald would have wiped the floor with Fassbender in the acting department.

……..Lineth?

*gets husband to stab McDuff while he's listening to The Shins*

"Now we'll be substituting the ground beef in this chili for gently shredded grade-A sirloin. Taste the difference!"
(Portman has her place as an actress, but it's not in classical theater or anywhere near an accent.)