@avclub-0d4efaa2c9d1041eb9b8b5319eec8531:disqus seems to have adopted Hitchen's great misconception that being offensive is somehow inherently brave or intelligent, while being diplomatic is automatically cowardly and submissive.

@avclub-0d4efaa2c9d1041eb9b8b5319eec8531:disqus seems to have adopted Hitchen's great misconception that being offensive is somehow inherently brave or intelligent, while being diplomatic is automatically cowardly and submissive.

That punchline was so limp it may as well be fucking my wife.

That punchline was so limp it may as well be fucking my wife.

Gallipoli is a good film, but staggeringly racist.

Gallipoli is a good film, but staggeringly racist.

Julie Taymor is a testament to how a person can coast by on the success of a single production.  She's directed one decent musical, and exploited that credit to produce a disastrous Spider-Man adaptation and three awful films*.

Julie Taymor is a testament to how a person can coast by on the success of a single production.  She's directed one decent musical, and exploited that credit to produce a disastrous Spider-Man adaptation and three awful films*.

John Carter deserves no attention at all, whether snarky dismissals or otherwise.  It is aggressively mediocre.

John Carter deserves no attention at all, whether snarky dismissals or otherwise.  It is aggressively mediocre.

He spent two-thirds of the film topless, and he is pretty ripped.  But aside from that, redneck serial killer.  Certainly wasn't strong enough eye candy to justify the film.

He spent two-thirds of the film topless, and he is pretty ripped.  But aside from that, redneck serial killer.  Certainly wasn't strong enough eye candy to justify the film.

Here's the thing: if any one sabotaged John Carter, it was Andrew Stanton.

Here's the thing: if any one sabotaged John Carter, it was Andrew Stanton.

I've seen that scene praised before, so I was very much relieved to see Tasha shitting all over it.  I watched John Carter on an aeroplane while sitting next to my brother.  He glanced at my screen during the flashback sequence and physically burst out laughing.  That was John Carter's sole stab at broody seriousness,…

I've seen that scene praised before, so I was very much relieved to see Tasha shitting all over it.  I watched John Carter on an aeroplane while sitting next to my brother.  He glanced at my screen during the flashback sequence and physically burst out laughing.  That was John Carter's sole stab at broody seriousness,…

Actually, it's like if Star Wars was called Luke Skywalker, which would still be pretty bad ass.

Actually, it's like if Star Wars was called Luke Skywalker, which would still be pretty bad ass.

Avatar was a superior film to John Carter, if only because it had just several laughable scenes instead of several hundred.

Avatar was a superior film to John Carter, if only because it had just several laughable scenes instead of several hundred.